Weird & Wild MLB highlights of the month: Snell, Cease, cycles and … Dom Smith, Cy Young?

We had one of the Weirdest and Wildest no-hitters ever twirled — and I bet it isn’t even the one you’re thinking of. … We had a cycle that was an all-timer — in ways that included the alphabet. … And I’m pretty sure it’s now totally valid to argue that Dominic Smith has a case for the Cy Young Award.

But first, let’s talk about Blake Snell. Until he took the mound Friday, this column was going to be a fun little recap of July, just to remind you how much Weirdness and Wildness had busted out since the last edition of this column. But then baseball happened.

So before we get to Weird and Wild’s roundup of the Best of July, there’s this:

Breathe a Cy of relief

Hey, the reigning Cy Young Award winner — that would be Blake Snell — threw a no-hitter! That seems like the kind of thing Cy Youngs should do, right? Well, there has never been a Cy Young no-hitter like the one this Cy Young spun Friday night in Cincinnati. Let’s document that.

NO RUNS, NO HITS, NO CYS — Of course we’ve seen a reigning Cy Young winner pitch a no-hitter before. It’s happened four other times, in fact: Sandy Koufax in 1964, Bob Gibson in 1970, Clayton Kershaw in 2014 and Jake Arrieta in 2016. So Blake Snell won’t go down as the only name on that fun list. But …

How many other times has an incumbent Cy Young’s first win of the season been a no-hitter? Who out there shouted: None? Way to shout. The first Cy to do that was Snell. Which is Weird (and Wild) enough. Except …

He collected that first win of the season on Aug. 2. So before we get back to digging into the no-hit nuttiness, let’s think about just how bizarre that is.

WAS THAT AN AUGUST MOON — All right, how strange is it for the reigning Cy Young to make it to August before he wins a stinking game? Oh, exactly as strange as you think it is.

I ran this past my friends from STATS Perform. Here you go:

Are we counting 2020? That seems like cheating, since the season didn’t even start until July 23. But if we are, Jacob deGrom would hold this record, because he collected his first win on Aug. 3. So we need a ruling here. And here’s that ruling: Why the heck would we count that? Sorry, Jake.

So if we’re not … then absolutely, Snell is the first reigning Cy Young winner to make it all the way to Aug. 2 before winning his first game. The previous record was July 28, by Jim Lonborg in 1968.

Asterisk alert! Sandy Koufax retired after winning the 1966 Cy Young, so he doesn’t count. And Pete Vuckovich tore his rotator cuff after winning the 1982 AL Cy Young, so he never threw a pitch until Aug. 30 and never did win in three starts that year. So we’re ruling him out, too.

But it also took Snell 11 starts! Why don’t we look at how historic it is for a reigning Cy Young winner to g0 11 starts — yes, 11 — into a season before winning a game? That also would be a record, STATS reports. The old record was nine, by Lonborg in 1968. And the most in the last half-century used to be eight — by Corey Kluber (2015), Zack Greinke (2010) and Frank Viola (1989). Not anymore.

Another asterisk alert! For all you details, schmetails folks … per STATS, there also were three Cy Young relievers who took more than 11 appearances to win a game the next year: Steve Bedrosian, Mark Davis and Dennis Eckersley. But if starters are apples, relievers are oranges. So sorry. We’re not counting them, either.

Finally, this isn’t just wacky for Cy Youngs, you know – So as I compiled all these goofy little tidbits, a lightning bolt struck my brain. Wait. The heck with Cy Youngs. I’m not sure I’ve heard of any starter going into August without a win and then busting that drought with a no-hitter. So I fired that late-breaking question at STATS, too.

Yep!

Only one pitcher in the modern era has made at least five starts in a season, gone 0-for-April/May/June/July and then collected win No. 1 by throwing a no-hitter in August. And that would be … right, our man, Blake Snell.

MORE NO-HIT STRANGE BUT TRUENESS — Want a few more fun Blake Snell no-hitter facts? You’ve come to the right place:

His first win as a Giant was a no-hitter? That’s right. Which makes him the first Cy Young whose first win with a new team was a no-hitter.

He was allowed to throw 114 pitches? That’s right, too. It was tied for his second most ever in a start. (Career high: 117.) I remind you he once threw 99 pitches in 3 2/3 innings! That was two years ago, for the Padres, on July 14, 2022, in Denver.

He really won two Cy Youngs before he pitched a no-hitter? He sure did. But he’s not the first man to do that. Bob Gibson, Clayton Kershaw, Tim Lincecum, Corey Kluber and Johan Santana all did it, too. And Tom Seaver won three Cy Youngs before his first no-hitter. But …

Who else ever won two Cy Youngs before pitching a complete game? C’mon, folks. You know that answer is nobody. Obviously. But …

How about even one Cy Young before a complete game? Even that seemed almost impossible. Turns out, according to STATS, there is one more name on this list: Max Scherzer. His first Cy was in 2013. His first CG was in 2014 (in his 166th start).

If you ignore the fact that Corbin Burnes had more relief appearances (61) than starts (41, when he won his Cy Young Award, you could include him, too. But with 201 career starts before this no-hitter, does anyone truly belong in the same conversation as Blake Snell, a man who had never even thrown one frigging pitch in the ninth inning before he performed that incredible no-hit magic trick?

I think I speak for all of Weird and Wild Nation when I say: Blake, this is your Weird and Wild mountaintop. Everyone else is just glad they didn’t get caught in the rockslide.

But speaking of Strange But True no-hitters …

Cease fire!

I don’t know about you. But I’ve spent pretty much my whole life as a baseball fan with a bunch of records in my head that make me say: I’ll never see THAT one broken.

So Mr. Back to Back No-Hitters, Johnny Vander Meer, was always way, way up there on that list. Maybe not ahead of my hero, Old Hoss Radbourn, and his hallowed 60-win season in 1884. But waaaay up there.

And then Dylan Cease came along.

For one thing, this guy just pitched one of the Strangest But Truest no-hitters ever, for the Padres on July 25, in a game that started during breakfast back home in San Diego. I’ll have the big Weird and Wild highlights of that one coming right up. But first …

Can we call him Dylan Vander Cease? It is mind-blowing to think about how close this dude came to breaking Vander Meer’s “unbreakable” record.

July 13 vs. Atlanta — 6 IP, 1 hit
July 20 at Cleveland — 7 IP, 1 hit
July 25 at Washington — 9 IP, 0 hits

So are you adding along at home? That’s three starts, two total hits … and three starts in a row allowing one hit or none! Who else has ever done that (while pitching at least six innings in every start), you ask? No one in the modern era has ever done that, we reply. Take that, Johnny!

OK, OK. I know how baseball works in 2024. No chance Cease’s way too sensible manager, Mike Shildt, would have left him in to finish all three of those games, even if there were zero hits on the board. Whatever! Let me at least tell you how close Cease came to allowing zero hits in all three of those games.

The only hit in that July 13 game was this Marcell Ozuna “rocket.”

And the only hit in that July 20 game was this Tyler Freeman triple, which was almost tracked down by the center fielder, Jackson Merrill.

Just so you know, that ball had only a 36 percent hit probability, according to Statcast. Which I mention here, not just because it makes my case look better, but also because it was one of only two balls hit — over those two games combined — with more than a 23 percent hit probability. As opposed to the 37 swings-and-misses he piled up.

So there’s that. But now there’s this: Just try to argue that good old Johnny Vander Meer was more unhittable over his three-start run in 1938, which included those two no-hitters, than Cease was:

Yup. Your witness! Now back to our regularly scheduled Weirdness and Wildness.

Cease’s no-hitter had been over for approximately 12 seconds when the eloquent radio voice of the Nationals, Dave Jageler, checked in with some important news: Stuff happened in this game!

Since somebody had to dig into that stuff, he naturally thought of me, America’s official curator of Weirdness and Wildness. So off I went.

I hope you played 4-8 in the lottery! Every no-hitter has That Play. Or that’s what people always say after every no-hitter, anyway. But in this case, I’m in. Check out what happened when Juan Yepez led off the fifth inning of this game.

“If anyone can find the most recent 4-8 putout in MLB history, it is you,” Jageler told me, confidently. So here you go, Dave. Thanks to some incredible research by the president of Retrosheet, Tom Thress, we can tell you that the last 4-8 putout on any pop-up or fly ball happened as recently as …

Aug. 3, 1958! That was Phillies second baseman Solly Hemus doing the deflecting to his center fielder, Richie Ashburn, on a ball hit by the Cubs’ Alvin Dark. How ’bout those names?

But also: In the entire Retrosheet play-by-play database, which is mostly complete back to 1912, there were only four other 4-8 putouts on any kind of pop-up or fly ball — one in 1943, two (in six weeks) in 1938 and one in 1918.

Except that’s not even the Strange But True part. How many no-hitters in these last 113 seasons have ever been preserved by a 4-8 putout of any kind? Right you are. Exactly one: Dylan Cease’s no-hitter.

Rain and no-hitters don’t usually mix! But that’s not all. This was also a no-hitter featuring a one-hour and 16-minute rain delay. And you don’t see that much. (It was in the first inning, before Cease had delivered a pitch, but still. He’d at least warmed up.)

So of course, we had to know how rare this was. For help, I turned to my friends at STATS Perform, because I’m a baseball writer, not Jim Cantore.

Reliable rain-delay data goes back to only 1997. But in all that time — nearly three decades — STATS found just one other no-hitter, not counting combined no-no’s, that included any kind of rain delay. And it was a cool one.

That was David Cone’s 1999 perfect game, which took a 33-minute raindrop intermission during the bottom of the third inning. But Cone kept pitching. And we’re all glad he did, because we got to drop his name right here. But finally …

Would you like a side of bacon with that no-hitter? What time was the first pitch of Cease’s no-hitter? That would be 12:05 p.m. Washington D.C. time … otherwise known as Was That the Snooze Alarm time in San Diego (aka, 9:05 a.m.).

So I asked the great Kenny Jackelen of Baseball Reference if any no-hitter had ever started quite that early in the town of the team throwing it. And that answer, at least in the era where we know start times of the games, was … only one. That was Ervin Santana, for the Angels in Cleveland, on July 27, 2011.

But that one was in the pre-pitch-clock era, so it didn’t end until 11:27 a.m. in Orange County … whereas the Dylan Cease Fan Club was celebrating at 11:11 a.m. where he resides. So if you’re watching back in San Diego, we interrupt this important rerun of “The Facts of Life” to report: There’s a Padres no-hitter! And also … How was your omelet?

Breaking the cycle

Who declared this Cycle Month? I must have missed that. I just know that there have been three cycles since the last Weird and Wild column. And before that: No cycles. So go figure. Or go cycling. Whichever is easier. Let’s look at this phenomenon.

ALPHABET SOUP — I know I’m not your typical cycle historian. But here’s where my off-kilter brain went when I started thinking about these three cycles:

Xavier Edwards (July 28) — first cycle in history by a guy whose first name starts with an X!

Yordan Alvarez (July 21) — first cycle in history by a guy whose first name starts with a Y! (’Bout time somebody put the Y back in “cycle.”)

Wyatt Langford (June 30) – fifth cyclist in history whose first name starts with a W. The others: Willie Stargell, Willie McGee, Wil Myers and Wally Westlake, who naturally had two cycles to go with his two W’s.

So if you’re a back-of-the-alphabet fan, we’ve just ripped through the W, X and Y. And there’s never been a cycle by a player whose first name starts with a Z. So hey, Zack Gelof! You’re up!

X MARKS THE SPOT — But hang on, because the Weirdness (and Wildness) of Edwards’ cycle didn’t stop with the alphabet.

How did the Marlins shortstop start his day? With a leadoff home run. He’s only the 11th player in history to kick off a cycle with a leadoff homer. The only other active player to do it? Trea Turner, in 2019.

Ah, but this gets better. Because Edwards came to the plate with two outs in the ninth, still a single short of the cycle, and then did this …

Xavier Edwards hit his first Major League home run earlier today.

He followed that up by completing just the 2nd cycle in @Marlins history! pic.twitter.com/5VDhZTioGx

— MLB (@MLB) July 28, 2024

An infield hit with two outs in the ninth to complete a cycle? That seems rare. Let’s discuss!

Who else could possibly have done that? By “that,” let’s answer this part of the question first: Who else has started a cycle with a leadoff homer and finished it with any kind of hit with two outs in the ninth? That would be nobody, our friends from STATS tell us. So how cool is that? But also …

Who else has even finished a cycle quite like that? And by “that,” this time, let’s pose it this way: Who else has ever found himself at the plate with two outs in the ninth, needing a single for the cycle, and then actually hit a single?

STATS researched that question, too. Over the last 50 years, 13 previous players had come to bat with two outs in the ninth needing some kind of hit for the cycle – and then got it. But here’s the breakdown on those hits: two home runs, six triples and five doubles.

So what’s missing? Right you are. Only one man in all that time has needed just a freaking single to finish off his cycle — and then hit that single: Xavier Edwards.

Dom Smith, run stuffer

This game really happened, on July 24 at Coors Field, where games like this feel like they’re slightly more likely to happen, for some reason:

Rockies 20
Patriots (I mean Red Sox) 7

SO YOU SAY THAT’S A FOOTBALL SCORE, HUH? OK, I actually just kind of did that myself. But I apologize, because you know how many games in the entire NFL season last year ended 20-7? If you just guessed none … you’ve read this column before!

CAN’T ANYBODY HERE GET THIS TEAM OUT? I can’t say for sure that Alex Cora, manager of the team that gave up those 20 runs, uttered those words exactly. But I did notice this odd development:

Actual Red Sox pitchers: 7 IP, 21 hits, 20 runs.
Red Sox 1B Dominic Smith: 1 IP, none of the above.

That’s right. In a game in which actual Red Sox pitchers allowed the Rockies to bat .500 (21-for-42), their first baseman then was allowed to pitch the ninth … and spun a 1-2-3 inning!

That then inspired one of the goofiest research projects I’ve ever embarked upon: Position players in the expansion era (1961-2024) who pitched a 1-2-3 inning in a game in which their team gave up 20-plus runs.

You can ask: What’s wrong with me? Or you can keep reading. I’d vote for option No. 2, but it’s your call.

(Source: Baseball Reference / Stathead)

Asterisk alert: On July 19, 1987, the Yankees brought in their catcher, Rick Cerone, to get the last three outs of a 20-3 loss to Texas. And he did, in fact, then go 1-2-3 — with a strikeout of Bobby Witt Sr. — plus a balk. But since Cerone entered in mid-inning, here’s our ruling: Not the same thing!

So what do you think? Dom Smith, Cy Young contender? Who says no?

Strange But True Games of the Month

It would take up all of cyberspace to list every wacky game in July. So if your favorite doesn’t make this cut, management sympathizes with your complaint. But here you go. Enjoy the ride.

Padres 10, Diamondbacks 8 (July 5) – Does it seem hard for a team to hit a grand slam and a go-ahead two-run homer in the ninth inning and still lose? Tell ’em, Wash. It’s incredibly hard. But the D-Backs pulled it off in this game, despite an Alek Thomas slam and Randal Grichuk lead-flipper.

So how hard is it? I asked STATS to check. They found one other team in history (regular or postseason) — the Blue Jays on June 19, 2008 — that hit a slam and a multi-run homer in the ninth and still lost. But how many teams had ever taken the lead in the ninth on one of those homers and still lost? That would be … not one!

Yankees 11, Red Sox 8, in 10 innings (July 27) — I know that the Yankees-Red Sox rivalry act ain’t what it used to be, but wow. How great was this game? So great it was tied five different times (3-3, 4-4, 5-5, 6-6 and 8-8) before the Yankees kicked a field goal in the 10th.

It was only the third time in the history of The Rivalry, according to STATS, that any Yankees-Red Sox game was tied five times or more. The others:

Sept. 29, 1956 (Red Sox win in the 13th on a two-run single by … um, Milt Bolling?)

Sept. 5, 1936 (Yankees tie the game in the ninth when Lou Gehrig scores Joe DiMaggio, but it winds up in a 12-inning tie, because they forgot to install light bulbs at Fenway!)

Diamondbacks 9, Nationals 8 (July 29) — That Thing You Never See in this game was this: The Nationals score five in the top of the first … but then lose because … the Diamondbacks score five in the bottom of the ninth.

So how rare is that? The remarkable Katie Sharp of Baseball Reference could find only two other games, since 1912, in which a team gave up five runs (or more) in the top of the first but then won on a walk-off by scoring exactly that many runs in the bottom of the ninth. Here they are:

Sept. 2, 2012 (Phillies score five in the first, Braves then win it on a Chipper Jones three-run bomb off Jonathan Papelbon to cap a five-run bottom of the ninth.)

June 30, 2006 (Cleveland puts up five in the top of the first, but Reds win it on a walk-off lead-flipping slam by the great Adam Dunn, off Bob Wickman).

A’s 18, Phillies 3 (July 14) – Finally, this game was so wild, it’s not just a note. It’s practically a Hulu miniseries. Here come five ridiculous tidbits from this one:

At least it wasn’t the first time the A’s scored 18 in Philly. Except the last time they did it, they were the home team: Connie Mack’s Philadelphia A’s 19, White Sox 7 at Shibe Park, on Sept. 13, 1935.

They definitely walked a crooked mile. As loyal reader (and ace researcher) Eric Orns reports, the A’s had six consecutive innings with a crooked number. As in: 2-2-3-3-3-5! We’ve seen that done only three other times in the expansion era.

No one left behind. Ever heard of a team that scored 18 runs but only left one runner on base? The A’s did it in this game. How many other teams in the live-ball era have scored that many runs and left only one (or none) on? That would be zero, Orns reports.

Crazy eights. Then again, in a related development, the A’s hit eight home runs in this game, for just the second time in franchise history. And seven of them came from just three guys: Lawrence Butler bombed three. Seth Brown hit two. And Brent Rooker became the first to hit two home runs over the stands in Philly and onto Ashburn Alley.

Brown was hitting .191 at the time. Butler was hitting .201. Orns could find only three other sets of teammates with averages that low who had multi-homer games in the same game. But how many other three-homer games were part of that barrage? Right. Not one.

They were all in scoring position. And … one more nutty tidbit from Orns. You’d think that to score 18 runs, a team would have to get a ton of hits with runners in scoring position. Well, not if you hit eight home runs!

The A’s had only five plate appearances with a man in scoring position all game — and just two of them in the first eight innings. Want to guess how many previous teams had scored 18 runs with that few runners in scoring position? Zero would be an excellent guess, because … baseball!

Don’t try this at home

There are lots of ways to win a game in extra innings these days, now that those Zombie Runners are out there wreaking havoc. But this one was so impossible that when Kevin Brown, the great Orioles play-by-play man, had finished describing it on MASN, the next word out of his mouth was:

“What?”

Check it out. You’ll see.

So how’d the Orioles beat the Marlins in this game on July 25? By singling into a double play — and a 9-2-6 double play to boot. That seemed creative. So I asked Baseball Reference’s Kenny Jackelen if he could let me know how creative.

Baseball Reference’s play-by-play files are mostly complete all the way back to 1912. Kenny checked them all. You may be shocked to learn that Ryan Mountcastle was not the first to single into a 9-2-6 DP that drove in the winning run in extra innings. But the list of other men to do it consists of exactly one guy: Mike Piazza.

On July 7, 2005, Piazza stroked a tie-breaking, 11th-inning single into right field in Washington. Then exactly the same 9-2-6 circus busted out. Cliff Floyd made the out at home. Piazza made the out at second. The assists went to Jose Guillen and Brian Schneider. And this whole note was worth it just to be able to type those names.

Deja MVP

The trade deadline is a never-ending source of Weird and Wildness. We all agree on that, right? But this might be my favorite trade deadline nugget ever.

2021 — Jorge Soler wins the World Series MVP award for the Braves

2024 — Braves trade for former World Series MVP Jorge Soler!

So what’s so fun about that? How about this:

The Braves just traded for that guy who won the World Series MVP car/trophy for their team.

Maybe this occurred to you. Maybe it just occurred to me. But here’s what I thought, anyway: That can’t have happened much.

After all, that means this dude has to lead you to a parade … and then you let him go play somewhere else … and then you think, years later: Hey, maybe we should go out and get that guy. He was good here once.

So I asked the brilliant Katie Sharp of Baseball Reference to look into this for me. Turns out that Soler is only the third former World Series MVP to get traded back to the team he was playing with when he won it. (Author’s note: Nostalgic free-agent reunions are a whole different deal, so they’re not included. Just trades.) Now on with the list.

Pete Rose — won the 1975 World Series MVP award for the Big Red Machine. Got traded back to the Reds, from the Expos on Aug. 16, 1984. That was so the Reds could make him their player/manager. And hey, that went smoothly.

Randy Johnson — won the 2001 World Series MVP for the Diamondbacks, possibly because he was the winning pitcher in Games 6 and 7 of the World Series. Then got traded back to Arizona, by the Yankees, on Jan. 9, 2007. The plan was for him to win his 300th game as a Diamondback. That part of the plan didn’t go so smoothly, either, since he exited after two seasons still sitting on 295 wins, then won his 300th as a Giant.

So what’s in store for Jorge Soler? I bet it won’t be as memorable as the trades for those two guys!

A river runs through it

River Ryan won a game for the Dodgers last week. So how could I not look at that and present … The All-Water Team!

I didn’t confine this to any particular positions. By the time I finished this soggy research endeavor, I was obviously waterlogged! So here they come:

Mickey Rivers
Steve (Great) Lake
Brooks Robinson
Simon Pond
Connor Seabold
Jason Bay
Les Channell
Bill Dam

And (of course) …

George Canale

Feel free to nominate your own watery favorites. They’re out there!

Introducing the All-Cantina team

Meanwhile, Nacho Alvarez Jr. made his big-league debut for the Braves two weeks ago. Which is exciting, if only because it obviously means there’s a Nacho Alvarez Sr. But it’s also exciting because it gave me a chance to fire up the first ever All-Cantina team!

Chipper Jones
Chip Hale
Ben Rice
Billy Beane
Joey (Pico de) Gallo
Ryan Burr(-ito)
Javier (Carne) Assad(-a)
Tyler (Ta-)mahle
Tayler (Chips and) Saucedo
Frank (Salsa) Verdi

And our manager …

Scott Servais(-a)

One more from our Name Game Dept.

Yes, they McCann. On July 6, this happened.

McCann vs. McCann. McCann wins.

The @Athletics have scored 19 runs today pic.twitter.com/K7NBpTqzXK

— MLB (@MLB) July 6, 2024

That’s Kyle McCann hitting a home run off James McCann. Only one of those McCanns is actually a pitcher. Can you figure out which one? You probably McCann!

Read him his Miranda rights

It’s amazing how 12 at-bats can rewrite the entire story of a man’s career, isn’t it? So let’s talk about Lin-Manuel Miranda’s cousin, Jose Miranda of the Twins — and the 12 at-bats that changed everything.

Those 12 at-bats came July 4-5-6 against the Tigers and Astros. And the reason we’ll be looking back on them for, like, the next 400 years is this: How many hits did he get in those 12 at-bats? That would be … 12!

Think about that … he went 12-for-12. No one had done that in 72 years, since Walt Dropo in 1952. So think about what that means. It means Tony Gwynn never went 12-for-12. Wade Boggs never went 12-for-12. Pete Rose, Derek Jeter, Henry Aaron, George Brett, Rod Carew, Roberto Clemente. None of them ever went 12-for-12.

But Jose Miranda did that. Before we keep spewing out more fun 12-for-12 tidbits, we’re required by Weird and Wild rules and regulations to get a bunch of Hamilton quips out of the way. So …

Would you say history definitely had his eyes on him? Yep. And is the world going to know his name? We’re doing our best to help with that. His world will never be the same if we have anything to do with it.

OK, done. Now here’s the truly Weird (and Wild) part of this:

You know how many hits Jose Miranda got in the big leagues after April last year? How about four. As in 4-for-35. And then that same player, a year later, just went 12-for-12?

Go ahead. Try to explain it. Only one word does, you know. That would be …

Baseball!

Does he squirt Cheese Wiz on those shutouts?

Now here’s another uplifting tale. Zack Wheeler hasn’t thrown a shutout for the Phillies this season. But you know who has? That would be a little-known rookie on his team named Tyler Phillips.

Here’s how he worked himself into this column: He grew up in South Jersey, rooting for the Phillies. And then … he threw a shutout, in Philadelphia, for the Phillies (July 27, against Cleveland).

So I got to thinking: How many pitchers have grown up in Philadelphia (or at least in the Pennsylvania, Jersey or Delaware suburbs) and then … thrown a shutout for the Phillies? I looked just at the expansion era. It’s one fun list:

Tyler Phillips (N.J.) — July 27, 2024
Jamie Moyer (Pa.) — May 7, 2010
Ken Reynolds (Pa.) — July 18, 1971
Chris Short (Del.) — threw 24!
Dallas Green (Del.) — April 15, 1961

Strange But True Box-Score Lines of the Month

Do you still read box scores? You should. Here’s why. None of these guys set out to make it into this column. But as you know in baseball … stuff happens! And it happened to them.

Patrick Corbin, Tuesday in Arizona — 3 IP, 13 H, 11 R, 10 ER, 0 BB, 3 K, 1 HR

So what’s up with that? Poor Patrick Corbin. He didn’t just take the loss in a 17-0 game. He also became just the fifth pitcher in the last 80 years to give up 11 runs (or more) without even having to walk anybody! Of course, as Bob Forsch once famously quipped after allowing 18 hits but no walks: “Why would they want to?”

Lance Lynn, July 6 in Washington — 2 2/3 IP, 9 H, 11 R, 10 K, 4 BB, 2 K, 3 HR, 1 HBP, 22 batters faced, 11 of them scored

So what’s up with that? How challenging is it to give up 11 runs but get only eight outs? Lynn was just the second Cardinals in the live-ball era to do it. The other: Darryl Kile, on April 13, 2000 (at Coors).

Drew Thorpe, July 26 vs. Seattle — 2/3 IP, 6 H, 8 R, 8 ER, 2 BB, 1 K, 3 HR

So what’s up with that? Does this sum up the White Sox season? They trade away a dude who throws a no-hitter (Dylan Cease). The next day, one of the guys they got for him becomes the first starting pitcher in the modern era to serve up three homers, give up eight runs (or more) and finish his day with more homers (three) than outs (two).

Brayan Bello, July 9 vs. Oakland — 5 1/3 IP, 9 H, 5 R, 5 ER, 2 BB, 11 K

So what’s up with that? The Red Sox want to love this guy. But was he unhittable in this game? Or really, really hittable? Discuss!

Bello’s first 10 outs in this game: All strikeouts! That’s good. But the first five guys who somehow put the ball in play? They all got hits! That’s not so good. The best news was, he struck out 11. The worst news was, the guys who actually put the ball in play hit .692 against him (9-for-13)! So what the heck was this? Clearly, the most unhittable hittable outing ever!

Hmmm, you look familiar

Paul DeJong had an interesting week. When the White Sox-Royals series began Monday, he was playing for the White Sox. By the time it ended, he was playing for the Royals. But that’s not the Weird (or Wild) part.

The Weird/Wild part is: Thanks to the miracle of the trade deadline, Paul DeJong just got hits for both teams in the same series.

I live for stuff like that. I know I probably need help.

My real problem is that when I get hyped about these things, I drag innocent civilians into helping with these wacky notes. So to Katie Sharp, my good friend and favorite research genius, let me say this: I’m sorry!

All I asked Katie was: Hey, how rare is that anyhow? Many hours of computer programming later, she learned that way too many general managers in 1909 apparently wanted to grow up to be Jerry Dipoto. So since it wasn’t that rare then, I’m not going all the way back in baseball time.

Here they come, all the players in the last 75 seasons who have gotten hits for both teams in the same series. You’re welcome! And please thank Katie Sharp. Profusely.

Paul DeJong (2024) — White Sox/Royals
Abraham Toro (2021) — Astros/Mariners
Doug Mientkiewicz (2004) — Twins/Red Sox
Woodie Held (1968) — Angels/White Sox
Billy Martin (1957) — Yankees/A’s
Ralph Kiner (1953) — Pirates/Cubs

It isn’t every baseball column out there that can cram Abraham Toro, Doug Mientkiewicz, Billy Martin and Ralph Kiner into the same note, you know. So see, Katie? It was worth it!

All that Jazz

There probably will come a time when Jazz Chisholm Jr. won’t hit two home runs every game as a Yankee. Just keep that helpful advice in mind, OK, if only because …

Jazz in 403 games as a Marlin: hit two in a game three times.

Jazz in his first three games as a Yankee: hit two in a game two times.

No player in history had ever had back-to-back multi-homer games within his first three games after getting traded in midseason (or any other time). That’s not too surprising.

Here’s what was surprising: How ’bout this list of players who never had back-to-back multi-homer games for the Yankees:

Lou Gehrig
Joe DiMaggio
Yogi Berra
A-Rod
Don Mattingly
Reggie Jackson

But Jazz has already done it, and he’s only been there a week. How does that make sense? Oh, that’s right. It’s ….

Baseball!

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(Top image photos: Blake Snell: Katie Stratman / USA Today; Dominic Smith: David Zalubowski / Associated Press)